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Sunday, January 08, 2006

Need TP for My Bunghole..Heh heh

yesterday
wa
Lupa
Berak
Laa
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o
O
(0)



Sekian, telima ka.....opps belum habis lagi!
Ini sambungan posting di situ luangan tikus keji ya...


69 comments:

Wong Ah Beng said...

[HeHehHeHhehHe..]



================================
PERHATIAN!!!!
================================

Hari ini saja mau bikin kelainan tulis pendek2 di posting. Sini wa sambung celita blog wa hali ini (Dan maka rugilah barangsiapa mereka2 yang tidak membaca ini luangan tikus keji)

:P

===============================


Dulu aa wa suka minum teh olang kampung.
First time minum itu teh aah, sungguh saspen worr. Tetapi lama kelamaan menjadi manyiak syiok juga...

Ini teh berfungsi untuk kasik flush lu punya sistem pelut. Dua jam selepas lu minum ini teh aaa, wa gelenti lu akan mau pegi toilet kasik buang. Talak boley tahan-tahan. Dia punya keluar pun selupa mesingun juaa pomm pomm pom pomm!! Agak messy kelana habis segala bahan2 isi kangdungan pelut lu kene cuci...

Namun very the best jua kelana badan lu akan telasa lebih lingan. Talak tipu!

Walaubagaimanapun, akibat mengamalkan tabiat peminuman teh olang kampung ini terlalu kerap, kesannya sulah tiada lagi. Mungkin sistem badan wa telah immunisasi sama itu teh. Sulah talak syiok. So sekalang wa tidak lagi mengamalkan peminuman teh herba ini.

Sebenarnya wa pernah terbaca satu artikel kajian sains dan teknology mengatakan bahawa isi pelut kita mengandungi sekulang-kulangnya satu kilo najis. Lu bayangkan saki-baki najis2 yang talak keluar habis aa, melekat di dalam lu punya dinding usus. Setiap hari, setiap tawun selama bertahun2 lu hidup aa, ia akan berkumpul-kumpul, menjadi keras dan sebati. Selupa itu kolesterol di dalam saluran jantung lu.. Lama2 mesti sumbat punya... Sama jua ini konsep.

Moral of this stoly; adalah bagus untuk kita kasih flush sama pelut kita sekali sekala. Teh olang kampung.. Very the messy, yet healthy for the body..

Oh by the way, lu jangan cepat malah sekilanya suatu hali nanti ada olang cakap sama lu:

"YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT!!!"

Dia mungkin betul; You might be full of shit.
I know I am [haha]
.
.
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Ok..Sekian, telima kaseh.

yato said...

ahem. nak kuruskan badan ke minum teh tu ?? hu hu

brainlessmonkey said...

Woiii merapu la kucin bacin!! Go play with your own 6 tits!! Muahahahahahahahahahahha... here kitty kitty...

WLady said...

selamat pagi ah beng.. ini kali lu punya apploach manyak lain woo.. wa manyak suka.. untuk lespon lu punya post ini kali aa, wa tak payah minum itu teh olang kampung, teh olang bandar pun boleh kasik flush sama hebat. sikalang wa sudah tatak minum teh oo pasat wa ada miglain..

may said...

ahbeng, itu teh olang kampung mana boley dapat? wa nak cuba, ada consti... errr... ada nak cuba lah! *buat tak tahu*

Cik Puan Muda Stress said...

dear beng2,

sekilo? are you sure beng? In that case, if my weight is 50, meaning my 'real' weight is only 49 la kan? minus saturated fat weight lagi.. WOW..ntah2 my berat is 40 only..huhhuhu.. kalah arits!!!

sigh..denial...

leez1312 said...

dahlink, wa sangat suka bila lu menjagakan dili lu walaupun wa talak di sisi. wa juga akan cuka mengikuti nasihat2 my dahlink kelana badan dn wotak yang celgas latang dali pelut yang sihat.

majulah teh olang kampung utk pelut kita sejagat :)

sekian sahaja. telima kasih dahlink.

fara said...

I'm full of shit too. So don't give me one.

:P

Has said...

mana boleh beli teh ni, cuba beri gambar kat blog lu dan nama kedai, wa dah tertarik nih

Simply Syana said...

beng..

sekali sekala shud be ok. but not too often cos it wud be as same as being bulimic - only come out 'the other way'. muerhaha

Desparil said...

are you threatening me?

Charlie said...

Ok ok, I got to hand it to you. Berak pun ada orang comment. Syabas!

cikPijah said...

hebat ah kucing ni pandai wat air teh sendiri! not just any air teh! teh org kampung lagi! suspect laa!!

jasmine79 said...

bengbeng: ape susah sgt nak beli teh olang kampong tuh..makan jer julap, i gerenti segala2nye akan keluar dari perot..;)i wonder until this far, ini blog kucing ke blog tuan punyee kucing..:P lain mcm jer..spooky*

jasmine79 said...

bengbeng: get some excercise..your perut need some adjustment.

tooooots said...

teh orang kampung is blergh.
we hates it!!!!

but yesh it is very the good for the stubborn turd.

ada satu lagi cara kalau nak flush tanpa having to go thru the kekejian of teh orang kampung
makan ciku n papaya banyak2!


selamat raya haji encik meow!!!

paRoe said...

Ceii Beng.. patut la lu berak merataa.. taik tak pernah habis dalam perut. Cei banyak busuk!!!

anisism said...

ko memang kompem saiko laa aku ingat.

Wong Ah Beng said...

yato..
haa betul.. kene kasik buang lagi 15kg lemak yg berlebihan :|

blainlessmungkey..
go play with your monkey..spank it! spank it! huhuk..huhuk.. ;p

wlady..
teh olang bandarr aa?? wa talak penah dengar ini teh bandarrr woo.. :?

may..
may is my fav month for getting a consti.. err ..wa pun kurang pasti mana mau carik. Dulu beli sama kawan. :/

Wong Ah Beng said...

cikpuanmudastless..
aa..minus air dalam badan lagi, your 'real weight' could be lower :D

leez1312..
lahlinggg. lu ada mengamalkan pemakanan jamu rapat pepet aa?
:)

fara..
But...but... I tot people like my (b)shit.. ho ho ho :p

has..
Wa tatau mana wa punya agent dulu angkat ini teh laa.. :>

Wong Ah Beng said...

simple syana..
i think more like extreme case of
diarrhea.. poommm!pooom!pooom!!poom!
:o

desparil..
Settle down Beavis! huk huk.. :B

charlie..
hahaha!

cik pijah..
mesti maah..wa magic cat.. :B

Wong Ah Beng said...

justmine69..
julap tak best..sebab talak boleh bancuh minum macam teh..
so coffee, tea of me? :>

justmine69 again..
Getting rid of stubborn turds is a form of an exercise too u know :p

tuuuuts..
selamat hali laya kolban..balik mana ya :?

paroe..
i bet my shit is stinkier than yours.. :B

anisism..
saiko takpe..jangan obses!
do u have any real sisters?
:>

9 said...

itu teh olang kampung pun bole buang itu angin satu badan. jikalau kandungan isi pelut lu tala lagi, lia akan mengeluarkan angin sepoi2 bahasa. lu akan berasa lebih lingan lagi selepas itu.

tetapi lu jgn minum sebelum keruar sama lu punya ah moi.. haiya, manyak malu wo..

Erra said...

lu manyiak siao laa ah beng

lu bagi banyiak pelempuan itu jatuh hati sama lu punya gambat, lepaih itu ha lu pangsai atas lu punya gambat

vely the psycho cat la lu ah beng

nett.nadia said...

ish..banyak betul shit...

tp selalunya org minum teh herba ni sbb nak slim. memang berkesan utk turunkan 2,3 kilo. shit je dah sekilo, yg lelain tu air je la kot.
seksa oo...sejam mau 3 kali kena pi toilet..

Wong Ah Beng said...

9..
istilah angin sepoi2 bahasa adalah terlalu "mild" untuk menggambarkan keadaan tersebut.
Try Hurricane Katrina :O

erra..
I believe in putting the 'psycho' back in 'psychoanalysis' :)

nett.nadia..
yaa..kasik overhaul perut. Untuk minda yang cerdas dari badan yang sihat bermula dari perut yang bersih :/

Erra said...

well dear,

i'm psycho-analysing you.

*scratching ah beng's back*

Wong Ah Beng said...

erra..
u scratch gooooood.
Lower..lower...!

leez1312 said...

dahlink aaaa....
pengamalan pemakanan jamu rapat pepet dan yg sewaktu dengannya amatlah terbagusssssss esp utk kebaikan sejagat :)

muahahahaha.....

p.s. lu ada makan jamu rapat 'popot' aaaaa? hihihihihi

Leen Ash Burn said...

Ah Beng,

Tapi persoalannya iyalah: ada lu pangsai melata-lata? Atau lu hanye pangsai di pokok munge los lumah jilan sebelah lu?

anisism said...

i have 2 married REAL sisters. so i don't need anymore to that. especially the ones who have the access to my blog. bwahahahahhaa.

Mr Hobo said...

waaaa ... lu actually did it! hahahaha .. caya lah!

pinky angel said...

wa sudah dkt 5 hali tidak belak.haiyyaa...

efek teh olang kg - buasir.. kwn wa kena oo..bkn main2.wa tamau amek risk

Islington, T. A. said...

I don't know if anyone explained this yet cause malas nak read what every tikus keji wrote, but:

The reason why you Can't Go is probably because of those Teh Olang Kampung you consumed. The tea is a form of harsh laxative which scrapes your stomach and usus besar lining. That is why you kept Going during the course of your consumption. The stuff the lining is made of helps Particles & Stuff pass through. So prolonged consumption can cause constipation, which is what you're experiencing now. Looks like you've been effed by the Olang Kampung :-P

zuhri said...

uklain kali minum sikit-sikit. selang dua atau tiga hari. jangan la minum hari-hari.

RaNdoMHEarTsOfArMylla said...

haha...ah beng ..sama la kita....
i pun minum teh herba orang kampung...and still do...
years already...bukan takde kesan...
still ada...instead of many times a day(this happens the first week you take it)...it becomes once a day...depending on your food intake...if you mkn byk...err..die tak pom pom pom...you know what i mean...if you eat less...keluar sikit...

errr...what do i suddenly feel like i'm your shit therapist?

Apple Pie said...

beng, dun drink that seliming tea laaa.i dun like u kurus. i like ur tummy very much. huhuhuhuhuhuu

Puteri said...

aiyaaa...ahbeng manyak taik pun ramai chicks datang komen oooo! mmg keji la lu!

chics said...

Dulu kite penah minum teh orang kampung tapi bukan sbb nak kasik kurus tapi sebab kita nak stay up malam-malam untuk study.

It's like konon-konon kalau berak-berak tak boleh tidola tapi hahaha..
walaupon 2 uncang kite letak..tido kite tetap lenaaaaa..

tak berak-berak pon, lagi gemuk adela

jasmine79 said...

i prefer sirap bandung ler beng beng...sweeter and cremier..slurppss..:P i dont consumed too much of caffein neither a cat who think i must have him for a dinner..tp kalau buat satay kucing sedap jgk kan?? yum..yum...

jasmine79 said...

beng beng..so im sure all the fats in your tummy have been fully diluted by this teh org kg..so plz post some pic before and after the process..let this motivate others to lead a healthy life without even having to exercise..kalau boleh siarkan ukur lilit perut jugak before n after..;)

A Babe Of Very Little Brain said...

so, engkaulah the culprit yg telah mempangsai di depan pintu rumah ku!!!!!

chis !!!! takkan ku lupa keringat ku yg menitis ke bumi dan kata-kata tohmahan lagi nista yang telah kutujukan buat kucing keji yang begitu berani berbuat demikian!!!

Erra said...

spray haruman serai wangi untuk mengelakkan ah beng pangsai di hadapan rumah anda ... it works on my cats ... terkebil2 diorang fenin

Anonymous said...

aiya ahbeng ini teh mmg manyakkkk bagus pnye..
aku 7 hari 7 mlm x leh berenti nk membuang jek..
dari plan mau kasi cuci sket saja,ini teh sulah cuci abis wa pnye perut!!
sib baik x kene buasir..=)
kalo x abis la aku kene kick dr team aku...hehe..
start that day aku berazam x mau minum ini teh lg..
wa amalkan diet seimbang and bersenam loo..mkn buah2 ke..wa takut sama ini teh..
aiya manyak fobia..=$
so, apalagi jom la main basketball..

hehe...aku hanamichi..hait!

anisism said...

beng camne aku nak itallic kan 'him'. aku nak cakap 'he' left her for a 7-eleven, open 24 hours, noookkkssss! (btw, i lurrrve this one. yippie!)

anisism said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sleepless in Gelugoq said...

Beng, teh olang kampung patut angkat sama lu jadi dia punya duta. Lu tengok bape olang sudah cakap mau beli.. aiyoo if only they know..
hahah

*concreterose* said...

ahbeng.. meowww.. u ni buat advertisement for nona roguy or wat??

spender kat luar said...

gila la lu beng...cerita pasal cirit pun mampu memikat ramai peminat...sah diorang sumer dah ketagih blog lu...

madnessinvain said...

Itu teh buleh kurang buncit ka?

Wong Ah Beng said...

leez1312..
Olang kata jikalau lelaki mengamalkan jamu lapat pepek nanti lobang buntut dia jadik lagi ketat..ada butoi ka? btw jamu rapat popot itu kasik ketat apa pulak? :o

leen..
Wa pangsai di tempat tertutup dari kahayalak lamai kelana wa jua ada pelasaan malu mah. :D

anisism..
u need a cup of cuppa cum. :)

mr hobo..
menyahut cabalan..belani kelana benar maaa. :B

Wong Ah Beng said...

kinkiAngel..
5 hali aa?? hoiyooo itu maciam selupa montot ada sumbat jua.. apa maciam mau lepair? :?

islington,t.a.i.k..
like dat wan aa.. so better not take anymore horr.. I stopping laa like dis :/

zuhri..
yaa.. pengambilan berlebihan adalah tidak digalakkan kecuali lu ada masalah err...najis yg degil :)

landowhatsofamila..
heh heh..pomm poomm poomm! :>

appliepie..
But i dun like big-big tummy..i want my 6 pack..now 1 big pack woo :(

puteri..
wa punya taik haruman wangi maa..itu pasat lamai komen :)

Wong Ah Beng said...

chics..
uuhh..hi chics :)
Lu gumok mehh? wa tengok gambars lu talak gumoks pun masih yum yumm lagi woo ..

justmine69..
Yup silap bandung is nice jua.. do add a teaspoon of julap to have that teh olang kampung effect :)
satay kucing? Siao!

justmine69 again..
Haiihh..duwann laa pic of my tummy..i very shy-shy cat u knoww.. :o

babe..
i was just marking my territory maaahh.. itu adalah tanda bahawa kawasan lu dibawah plotection wa. so lu jangan lisau lagi jikalau ada kucing2 keji lain mau ganggu lu :)

Wong Ah Beng said...

erra..
sungguh kasihan kucing2 lu itu.. lu manyiak jahat.. Saruman pun talak jahat slupa lu.. >:(

anony:hanamichi..
7 hari 7 mlm talak berenti berak aa?
ho ho sungguh banyiak najis di dalam pelut lu..memang patut lu 7 hali 7 mlm pangsai.. kasik cuci hahaha :p

anisism..
him <-- ini maciam aa? lu gado sama dia lagi meh? wa ingat sulah settle..haha ;p

comment deleted..
uhh..hello. why the athor remove the post? :?

Wong Ah Beng said...

sleepless in glugoq..
biarkann...biarkan...pom pom pooom! hahah :>

conreterose..
talak laa..wa cuma blogging pasal itu ploduk sahaja.. :)

spenderKoyak..
they like my -bull- shit :D

madnessinvain..
hoiihhh lu pelut sebab banyak cacing laaa..tiada halapan mau kulus lagi..hahaha :D

anisism said...

gado gado manja cakar cakar taik ayam!

abgjiwajiwa said...

hi anisism, selamat berkenalan :)

Erra said...

ah beng

orang dah letak litter box, hapa nyer nak pangsai tempat lain. terpaksa guna haruman serai wangi. keh! keh! keh!

pinky angel said...

lu kasi kolek la..jgn bg sumbat. hahahahhaa

Wong Ah Beng said...

anisism..
saikooooooooooo!! :*

abgJiwaKacau..
Oii..oii..Guys, free for all. Girls, all mine! sila dapatkan tikus keji anda sendiri...herherher :>

erra..
litterbox sulah penuh laa... Talak ruang mau parking lagi:>

kinkiAngel..
tolong..tolong korekkan..cepat cepat! :o

Erra said...

ah beng ha

lu ala pigi itu enche zuhri punyat blog ... lu manyiak fofular laa sana ...

Wong Ah Beng said...

eerra..
ho ho ho :)

jasmine79 said...

yeah.. i think i have to agree with "mr.spender kat luar"..despite of the craps, cow shit, bull shit, cat shit..all the shit shit..yet, ppl keep coming supporting this blog..bukan ketagih tp maybe mereka dah jatuh chente dengan keturunan ah beng kot..:P haha..aiks..am i talking about myself?? yikess..yyaarrrggghpttuiii..:/ touchwood!!

jasmine79 said...

btw..im just part of the commentors..:P

she-blocks said...

i always want to gomol la kucing kuneng nih..gegham!!!

jasmine79 said...

i think ah beng is in his confinement period..hibernating mode.

Wong Ah Beng said...

justmine69..
I need huggies :(

justmine69..
I need huggies :(

she-blocks..
I need.. err.. huggies :(

justmine69..
I need huggies :(

jasmine79 said...

a BIG BIG HUGGGGGGGGGG for wong ah beng..im sorry dear..i know how it felt..be strong and stay cool..;) if you need a shoulder to cry on..dont hesitate to whisper me..meeoowww..:P just kidding..:)

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