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Thursday, December 29, 2005

Cara2 Mengatasi Putus Cinta

"Reject your sense of injury
and the injury itself disappears"

~Marcus Aurelius~


Lu punya kekasey buah hati telah melarikan dili bersama pasangan baru. Perasaan lu mungkin terganggu. Lu akan belasa worthless, dan confuse, serta uncertain of the future. Ini adalah normal bagi mereka-mereka yang baru lepas kena dump.

Tidak perlu risau lagi. Kali ini, wa ingin berbincang mengenai tips-tips untuk menghadapi masalah putus cinta. Belikut adalah antara 7 pelkara yang lu patut bikin selepas lu kena dump, supaya lu boleh kembali menjalani kehidupan normal seharian lu:


+---------------------------------------+
#1/ U should look like shit
+---------------------------------------+

Be sad. Be very-very sad. In fact, be miserable. Lebih lama lu sedih dan miserable adalah lebih baik. Jangkawaktu yang sesuai bergantung kepada individu sendili. Sesetengah olang belasa selesa untuk sedih selama 3 bulan. Olang lain pula mungkin memilih 6 bulan untuk bersedih. Malahan ada juga yang memilih untuk sedih dan miserable sehingga bertahun-tahun lamanya. The choice is yours.

Tidak perlu risau. Lebih lama lu memilih untuk sedey, adalah lebih baik. After all, u just got dumped. Hanya lu seolang sahaja yang sedih kelana hati sakit keciwa. Olang lain talak kes selupa lu. Segala masalah di dunia ini adalah kecil sahaja jika dibandingkan dengan malapetaka yang telah menimpa lu. So u have every right to be miserable and look like shit.


+---------------------------------------+
#2/ Always think of your ex
+---------------------------------------+

Remember that your ex is THE love of your life. Without him/her, you are nothing. Therefore you should be thinking more of your ex. Try to remember all the nice-nice memories. The bad memories oso can. People say the mind is a powerful thing. If you think hard enough with your mind, it might come true. Therefore you got nothing to loose, so think harder.


+---------------------------------------+
#3/ Keep on crying
+---------------------------------------+

Lebihkan masa menonton TV/DVD. Sekilanya tiada celita menarik di TV, sila tidor. Ohh, sebelum tido, pastikan lu menangis sepuas2 hati sehingga mata lu bengkak2. Lu kan balu kene dump (...6 bulan yang lalu?) so of kos lu kene sedey maa. Tambahan pula, mata yang bengkak akan memperolehi simpati dali olang lamai.

Jangan buang masa membuat aktiviti fizikal (sports/exercise/working) kelana ia tidak akan membantu mendapatkan balik lu punya ex. Lu cuma perlu berehat2 sahaja termenung seolang dili sambil memikirkan apa yang telah terjadi; ie mengapa lu kene dump, salah siapa etc etc..
Now is a good time for self reflection. Ohh, once you're done thinking and blaming yourself, pastikan lu sambung menangis sepuas2 hati.

Teruskan aktiviti ini sehingga dili lu menjadi tidak terurus. Tujuan ini adalah supaya lu akan jadik soo messed-up, kemungkinan besar lu punya ex akan belasa simpati sama lu dan membuat keputusan untuk dump awek barunya (yang 10x lebih cun dali lu) untuk kembali kepada lu.. Sapa untung? Lu jua untung.


+-------------------------------------------------------------------+
#4/ Luahkan perasaan anda di Internet. It helps.
+-------------------------------------------------------------------+

Sekalang zaman hightech. Luangkan lebih masa berinternet. Abandon your real friends. Who needs them when u have cyber friends. Chattinglah bersama lakan-lakan online anda mengenai lu punya masalah. Mengadulah kepada meleka how your heart was broken, and how much your feelings have been hurted. Meleka pasti akan sedia melayan lu 24 x 7.

Chat friends are kool. Not only u dont know them, they also dont have lives of their own that they can spend hours online just untuk memberikan kata2 semangat motivasi kepada lu. Setiap kali chatting, pastikan lu borak mengenai perkara yang sama berulang-ulang kali: how much u are hurted. Probably they'll repeat the same thing pujuk2 lu kasik motivasi. But that's ok becos u just want somebody to talk too...24 x 7...same topic...again...and again..

+---------------------------------------+
#5/ Start Blogging!
+---------------------------------------+

Sekilanya cyberfriends lu talak online, usah bimbang. Lu boleh start blogging pula! Lihatlah sahaja di blogosphere ini lamai yang memulakan aktiviti blogging setelah putus cinta. Of kos, u have to blog the usual...mengenai hati dan pelasaan lu yang terluka.. How much u hate your ex, but at the same time u wish him back, how you find yourself hard to trust another person. Pastikan setiap hali jua you blog benda yang sama. You're hurt..Boo hoo hoo...Its painful... Your ex is a bastard/bitch..You're hurt..Boo hoo hoo.. Oh! And make sure lu pergi tampal komen sama olang lain punya blog supaya meleka pun datang baca lu punya blog. Kesedihan lu akan berkurangan apabila lebih banyak olang baca blog lu. In fact, tampal gambar lu yang paling gorjes supaya lebih lamai olang ingin berkenalan sama lu. Untung2, you all exchange phone numbers, start calling2. But always talk about the same story; you're hurt..boo hoo hoo..

+---------------------------------------+
#6/ Expressi diri anda
+---------------------------------------+

Selepas lu kene dump, rajin2 lah lu calling-calling sama lu punya ex. Hantar jua email, sms atau sulat kepadanya. Pastikan topik perbualan anda setiap kali bercakap dengan ex anda adalah mengenai perasaan anda yang masih sayang dan lindu kepadanya. Merayulah kepadanya jika perlu. Walaupun lu tau dia sulah bahagia sama teman baru nya (yang 10x lebih cun dali lu), jangan cepat berputus asa! Tips: try to sound verryyy sad,miserable, frail and needy. Dihalap lu punya ex akan sedar bahawa lu teramatlah sayang padanya dan belasa simpati lantas ingin menelima lu kembali sebagai pasangannya. Pada peringkat ini, lu punya ego dan harga dili adalah tidak penting lagi, kelana lu telah kene dump. There is no hope... So sekilanya dia tidak kembali kepada lu, belmakna lu telah gagal di dalam kehidupan. Lu tidak layak untuk hidup bahagia seperti pasangan2 lain. Live with it.

+-------------------------------------------------------------------+
#7/ Jangan percaya kepada guys/girls anymore. They are bastards/bitches
+-------------------------------------------------------------------+
Understandable. After all, dia yang manyiak cilaka punya olang kasik dump sama lu. Walaupun lu telah menyayanginya sepenuh kasih sayang dan hati suci mulni memberikan cinta lu kepadanya, mungkin lu tertanya2 mengapa masih sampai hati dia sanggup dump sama lu. Jawapannya adalah mudah sahaja; guys/girls are bastards/bitches. Therefore, they kenot be trusted.

Pernah dengar ungkapan, "All guys(or girls, if you're guy) are the same"? Berita baik untuk lu kelana ungkapan tersebut adalah benar. Therefore jangan mudah percaya kepada guys(or girl, if you're a guy). Guy(or girl, if you're a guy) semua talak guna. Suka bermain-main sama hati dan perasaan olang Lebih baik sekilanya lu hidup seorang dili.

Jikalau lu polumpuan, adalah lebih terbagus lu menjalinkan hubungan dengan pengkid kelana meleka polumpuan boleh memahami lu, dan takkan kecewakan lu seumur hidup (tips untuk mencalik pengkid: sila selalu melepak di tempat polumpuan selalu main futsal). Better yet, be a lesbian!

Jikalau lu lelaki pulak, u have Mrs Rosy Palm with her five childrens to entertain you. Who needs women - They're all bitches, right? And if u desperately need a soulmate, consider another man. Then maybe lu olang boleh main "who's turn issit to pick up the soap"

Remember-> ALL guys are bastards and ALL girls are bitches. If you got dumped, its because it's ALL YOUR FAULT for having a relationship with a bastard/bitch in the first place.


So there.
The love of your life has just dumped you... Boo hoo hoo..
I hope u know what to do now ;D

Sekian telima kasih.


102 comments:

pinky angel said...

wahh.. once again,wa jadi olang 1st komen lu punya blog.manyiak senang hati..

bagus la u bg nasihat.gelenti olang2 yg putus cinta sng hati baca lu punya nasihat.haha..

dulu wa start blogging sbb ini la..haiyyaaa...

may said...

doktor ahbeng! nasihat lu manyiak best, lebih baik daripada doktor house itu! wa akan lekomen lu kepada kekawan wa yang telah putus cinta...

Anonymous said...

Ah Beng.. abis... lu blog sebab kene dump kaa? Keji la lu.. tarak kehidupan btol laar.. Hhahahahha.

Desparil said...

beng, wa mau tanya lu bebelapa pekala:

1. itu marcus aurelius.. itu wayang gladiator punya olang ah?

2. lu tulis "Therefore jangan mudah percaya kepada guys(or girl, if you're a guy). Guy(or girl, if you're a guy) semua talak guna."

kalau itu couple ah.. happy people punya couple.. apa macam?

3. lu mula blogging sebab lu punya gf lari sama itu jiran sebelah punya russian blue ah? ka sama itu british short hair belakang rumah? lu boleh bagitau sama wa.. nanti wa bagi kata-kata sokongan.

ok beng. itu saja untuk pagi mulia ini. tq.

Ely said...

hello, long time no see!

very good lu punya nasihat!

Anonymous said...

WAB, wa manyiak terase terguris dengan lu punya entry...hohoho...tapi wa sula sedar wa punya silap. Wa pomis dengan diri wa sendiwi lepas nih wa akan dump olang lain pula. Lu mau cuba jadi mangsa pertama ka? Hohohoho...

Apple Pie said...

ahbeng,ada lagi satu tambahan.

kalau frust hor lu kena makan banyak-banyak. even dulu lu suka diet pasal lu malu-malu kucing mau makan banyak masa dating. sekarang lah masanya untuk top-up balik makanan yg kurang didalam badan selama bercinta.

beng..come come i want to tarik ur misai :D

chics said...

ini topik i like.semua adalah betul tetapi adalah keji.

kalau kene dump, kawan saja dengan kucing.selain perut yang lemak mereka juga pandai cakar-cakar manja.

ngiau

sekain terima kaseyyyyyyyyyyyy

Cosmic_GurL said...

Ah Beng! Tips # 2, 6 n 7 tak bleh pakai langsung & nasihat yang paling keji pernah wa dengar! Why would I wanna think about my ex when he broke my heart in the first place? Ciss! Merepek merapu meraban la lu Ah Beng!

Lizzam said...

wa mau tambah: kalau lu sulah talak percaya sama lelaki/pelempuan lain, lu cali binatang aja.meleka akan tetap setia belsama lu walau asal lu tak lupa kasi makan.

ini lebih baik dali menjadi lesbo atau gay sebab kalau lu jalan huggy-huggy kissy-kissy di khalayak lamai belsama pasangan sejenis u mesti u kena kutuk wor. tapi kalu lu jalan sambil bawak lu punya minatang kesayangan olang tatak kisah munya. want to gt jiggy with it?get a room!

ah beng ah..wa tau lu still depressed so wa mau bagitau wa punya turtle still available.

sekian, telima kasih

kookabooras said...

aiyaa... manyak mutut lu ckp la ah beng. ada wa punya housemate suda clash. nanti wa bgtau sama dia lu punya tips. tp wa rasa baik lu jd monk, 'kasi' lu punya anu pastu duduk diam2. hahahaha. x payah pikir pasal awek.

nesloice said...

hahahahah...

ah beng, U never fail to make me gelak sorang2 ngadap monitor cam org gila pepagi buta ni, very in-the-face sarcasm at the finest, wa kowtow sama U laa :))

baragas said...

beng, ngo ada manyak sayang sama lu! lu munya nasihat manyak tepat tetapi disampaikan dengan cara yg ganas! wa lasa ini ialah cala yg tersesuai (dan keji) untuk menasihatkan orang yg kene dumpster ini!

ngo sayang lu beng! wa takkan dump you!

*btw: wa lelaki la beng!ok ka? lu jangan dump wa okay? nanti wa nangis woo asik mengingatkan lu!!

zuhri said...

ah beng, tak boleh pakai la tips ni, except for blogging. sapa nak ingat ex bila dah frust. baik cari awek baru cepat2

Si Nana said...

Hahahha. dont do these tips in front of me. free2 aku lempang aje nanti. i cant stand dengan orang2 yang asyik meratap dengan nasib celaka dirinya.

hellikonia said...

first time baca lu punya blog...
wa manyak suka itu title "tikus yang keji" lah...

brainlessmonkey said...

Wahhhh ini kucing sudah jadi Dr.Lurvvveeeeee ka? Manyak bagus ahh...multi talented pussy.

meena menachi said...

bravo! bravo! ahbeng, your advice is wonderful. keep it up! ah beng world!

RaNdoMHEarTsOfArMylla said...

wahh..lu memang pakar nasihat orang pututs cinta eh..lu sudah belapa kali kene dump?

Leen Ash Burn said...

abis beng lu tatak mau wa munya lacun laundap meh? wa ada lagi satu tong wor!

ailin...in aalborg said...

Crazy Cat, you forgot one more lah--dengar casette lagu2 jiwang. Micheal Learns to Rock, Westlife, Boyzone---semuanya boleh.

Jenny Haze said...

I remember of a blogger who wrote 'boo hoo' articles of past romances. Such a sad sod.

His name is TheRoadie.

Wong Ah Beng said...

kinky angel..
ho ho ho..olang yang pertama komen blog wa.. Nah ambil ini hadiah *kiss kiss* :@

may..
Ahah...u do dat okeh! btw my fav month is still May :)

anonymous..
Ooo tidak. Wa mula blogging sebab wa notice banyak blog yang talak best. wa jadik bosan, maka wa pun bikin wa punya blog sendili yang lagi best so wa boleh sendili baca :)

desparil..
1. Aaa yess..u rite
2. Happy couple adalah boleh percaya lagi, kelana meleka belum kene dump. Selepas dump, baru lah guy/girl tidak boleh dipercayai...uhh.bastards/bitches!!
3. ohh tidak..Wa blog sebab wa banyiak perkara2 keji mau share sama lu olang tikus2 keji. :/

Wong Ah Beng said...

ely..
Hi elly..long time no see u oso.
Would u like to pet me? mee-0owww! :)

anonymous..
Yes please.. But what do i get before i be your mangsa pertama? :@

applepie..
Hahhahah..sungguh bagus lu punya idea.. Damn! Camner aku leh lupa that one.. Uhh..by the way, Can I have u for dinner? I like apple pies. :)

chics..
hi chics. U always making my heart dup dap dup dap..Sayy, you have a zit on your forehead, can I pop it?

Wong Ah Beng said...

comic_gurl..
But issn't that's what u girls olways do? think bout your ex even if u try not to think? I know it gotta be painful. Lemme relieve u some of your pain..Come come.. :@

lizzam..
HAHAHahahah..yess u r rite. If you want unconditional love, go get a pet.
depressed? me? ohh tidak. I'm happily kejiing..i mean blogging away in my spare time. Dankyu for your kind offer tho. But wa talak suka turtles..kecuali ninja turtles sahaja :D

kookabooras..
hehhe..suluh lu punya housemate lepak sini luangan keji..ada lamai chickedees ..pilih!pilih! :D

nesloice..
U r kissing up my ass. But I like..
ngeh ngeh ngeh.. :D

Wong Ah Beng said...

baragas
ugh! Soli..wa talak main itu permainan tonggeng untuk angkat sabun..khaaakk ptui ptui..!! go away! go away! :D

zuhri..
Aaa..but you're missing the point :)

si nana..
wahwah...kasihan sama semua itu dumpster nanti dapat free lempang sama lu. sungguh brutal laa lu minah. btw, would you like to see my weapon? ;)

hellikonia..
first time eh? welkam..welkam..make yourself at home. Marilah bergumbila bersama tikus2 keji yang lain.. *Burp!* :o

Wong Ah Beng said...

brainlessmonkey..
uhuh..a monkey in my luangan for tikus keji..Say, if I massage your neck will you scratch my rash? :)

meena menachi..
ahah..AFUNDI AHBENG!

landomhatsofamila..
The count is still lower than the number I dumpster orang.. but anyway, nice pants; can I test the zipper? ;D

leen..
HAHahhaha..demmitt patut aku put that as one of the tips: Minum lah lacun loundap! Bagus untuk kesihatan ;o

Wong Ah Beng said...

ailin..
HehEHehe..yaa..yaa..dengar lagu2 jiwang..lepas itu boleh sambung menangis lagi dan lagi..heheheh..I like! :D

jenny haze..
Uhh..hello there. Alas, I'm not familiar with theRoadie guy.
btw, can i flirt with you? :)

kepala_angin said...

unconditional love from a pet!!

hah.. i don't think so.

You think if you don't feed your pet iam and kattyman, clean his potty and do other crappy things to maintain the pet, the pet would still love you meh. nope, the pet would run away long time ago.

sama la like human, ingat senang ke you nak dapat unconditional love, you will have to earn it laa.

memang emo sikit this comment because i bloody panas telinga bila ppl say "nak unconditional love go get a pet".. **baik tinggal dalam hutan macam tuh..

Sleepless in Gelugoq said...

wahahaha.
manyak belnas u punye tulisan itu. Who need Befrienders? Beng beng is better

Apple Pie said...

come lahling...come come eat me...ehhheheehhe

Wong Ah Beng said...

KepalaAngin..
Now..now..dont be mad. Lemme make it up to you; what if we have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you? :@

Wong Ah Beng said...

slipless in gelugoq..
uhuh..uhuh... :p

applepie..
Yippeee!! Can I have whipcream with that? :)

adekmanis said...

he he he.. gaduh kat sini pastu make up sex kat umah kan :p

Wong Ah Beng said...

chi..
Well, I'm developing this new make-out program. Would you like to join the beta test?

anisism said...

reversed psycho works.

kudos~










*tetiber je nak wat baik kat ko arinih. sebab otakku bernanah semula*

Wong Ah Beng said...

anisism..
ya lorr. wa pun dah giveup.
Biar je laa leen yang obsessi.
I'm curedd...i'm cured..! Yippee!

RojakBuah said...

lu manyak jiwaanggg er bengg..

Anonymous said...

love...love..love
wut a wonderful life..
rr ahbeng ah who do u love most r?
hehe..
i love everyone..

toooots said...

*diligently jotting down notes*

bagus bagus.
boleh di praktikkan.

number 1: cari bf.
number 2: get him to dump me.
number 3: execute nasihat kucing yang hebat.


oh encik kucing!
satu lagi!

Happy New Year!

Erra said...

siau laa lu ah beng

RaNdoMHEarTsOfArMylla said...

pants?...what ? where?....where got zipper wan....so what can you test?..hmmm?

Wong Ah Beng said...

lojakbuah..
uihhh..jiwang ke? mana ader? :?

anonymous..
Tell me who u really are and probably i'll tell :)

toots..
A happy *tooot* new year to u too you *toot*...*toooT!!* eh..censored pulak? :>

erra..
Hello..Do you have your own p0rn site? Can I have the url? :}

landomhatsofamila..
oops..wa silap olang..solli!
So do tell, what r u wearing right now..? ;/

brainlessmonkey said...

Gulp! If you have 10 gold with 5 carats of diamond flea collars pun gua tak nak scratch lu punya kurap!! Lu manyak hansap! Gua tahu lu kucing comel. I still dowan! I scared get your kutu. I go facial and groom my self every week. I am kurap-free thank you very much. I gayut from one tree to another dengan glamernya.

Wong Ah Beng said...

brainless monkey...
Oh ok..would u prefer me to spank your monkey instead?

pinky angel said...

ab beng..why ha..nowadays u sound more kejier?hehe.. more blue2 wan.. 18sx nye kuceng.. y ha? y? wa x sggp nak baca.wa punya otak manyak clean maa.. =p

Wong Ah Beng said...

kinky angel..
uhh..I've been a wondering meself..What's a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine...
smoochies? :@

p/s: I'm a cat laa..cats supposed to be gatal!

brainlessmonkey said...

kucing kurap

You are so keji!!

Cik Puan Muda Stress said...

ah beng spoken like a true 'dumpee'. hahahahaha. ahbeng, i'm sure you've went through all these crap to be able to pin point each characteristic so precisely kan?kan?kan?
sore loser la lu beng!!

la femme écrivain said...

bengbeng..
wa manyiak lbt laa tis time!
oledi 49 comments!
bengbeng..did u start tis blog becos u were dumped by some pussycat?
and tats y ur so keji nowadays as to avoid ur heart being hurt again?
owhh...u poor thing...

Wong Ah Beng said...

brainmonkey..
i would like to stresss..i du not have kuraps. I do have however, mat-free,fine long silky fur. Couple that with my sweet personality, I'm quite a catch..ok? So now, your apartment or mine?

cik puan muda stress..
Ouch!ouch! Stop the pain awwready...
Can't take it no more...boo hoo hoo.. btw, do you believe in one nite stand? :|

lafemmee...
Poor me..you can give me huggies afterwards..can i sit on your laps? nice laps u have there. Hows your pet turtle anyway, wazzis name sumthing and terjo..?
Oh! Would you like to see my pet eel?

pinky angel said...

izit true??cats supposed 2 be gatal?? alasan je tu..

now lay down.. lemme scratch ur back 4 u. kat mana gatal???

Anonymous said...

who am i?
i being dump by everyone
but still..
i love everyone..
plez my fren (termasuk kucing2 yg ade...ahbeng gak)
don hate each other..
love..love...
=)

WLady said...

encik kucen..
lu mmg buat hali² saya manyak celia..
hati susah muleh nyadi sinang..
hati talak sidap muleh nyadi sidap..
tapi aa.. saya manyak takut sama kucen woo.. nt melika cakat saya punya muka manyak scratch.. teluskan menulis supaya hati saya dan kawan² semua selalu celia..

telima kasik..

*concreterose* said...

u ni very the funny la ahbeng.. making me laugh sorang2x kat sini.. *muahaha*

zuhri said...

ah beng, kekadang kita dump orang pun kita banyak sedey. ada tips ke?

Wong Ah Beng said...

kinkyangel..
uhuh..uhuh...now when's my turn? :/

anonymous..
making love..not war.. :>

wlady..
Itu kuceng liar sahaja cakar muka maa...wa kucing jinak..Wa gigit pun talak kuat2..pelan2 saja. wont break your skin wann :)

concreterose..
Dankyuuu please cum againnn :p

zuhri..
1. Main ps2/pc games
2. berfoya-foyalah bersama pasangan balu
3. berikan lelaki lain kepada ex lu sebagai ganti. semuga dia lebih gembila.

zuhri said...

ah beng, lu berwajah baru. lu pakai kamera pinky angel ke? nampak lebih anggun la...hahahaha

Wong Ah Beng said...

zuhri..
tawun baru azam baru wajah baru..
:B

Apple Pie said...

ahbengggggg...i like ur new photo lerr. kiut and a bit kurus. u diet meh??? or u use effect2 one. come come i want tarik ur misai again and again

Wong Ah Beng said...

applepie..
yaa wa diet.
Kene la menten, nanti tak cute.
no effect2 needed :B

Apple Pie said...

u make me wanna...ehheheheh...gigit sama lu

kookabooras said...

ah beng, mlm td gua nampak lu punya geng kucing belon kene rush kat petaling street. tu aaa sape suruh lu peras ugut itu customer. Sapie Afdal menyamar jd customer pon lu mau pukul ka? haiya.. yanne yarre waneke tare maa??

Wong Ah Beng said...

applepie..
gigit? talak best lar..How about u sit on my lap and we'll see what pops up?
:)

kookabugas..
lu apa bikin kat petaling street malam2? heh heh

kookabooras said...

gua buat research pasal kucing ahbeng yg peras ugut customer kat petaling street. sikalang sudah manyak pandai amik bangla jd gangster. bikin kachiau la ini kucing. itu vcd blu sendili belakon pon ade jual jugak. buah olen masam cakap manis tp mulut pon ade busuk jugak.

Anonymous said...

serious aku tak paham ape kena ngan org yg comment kat sini....kenaper korang nak terikut sama slang cina yang WAB gune...atau adakah itu kehendak WAB...sumer org nak letak comment kat sini kena tulis style slang cine ker?...nasib ler aku ader nampak gak dua tiga manusia yang ikut slang sendiri....WAB...aper yg ko buat sampai begitu terpengaruh ni...ko pakai asap kemenyan ek????

leez1312 said...

dahlink aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
wa misssss u so much. sudah lama ooo talak baca sebab wa outstation. *MUAHS*MUAHS*
wa baca ini ently aaa, manyak sedih ooo sebab aa dahlink punya suggestions aaa some aaa very keji one, seperti hubungan sejenis. adalah menjadi kesalahan etika menjalinan perhubungan sejenis - very da dangerous! wa lasa seperti mahu menggigit dahlink dengan manja (hehe) bila dahlink berkata sedemikiennn. am sure u wudnt wanna end up wif da guys e.g zuhri, lizzam n baragas (sowie guys) n miss out all fun wif all the chicks u hv in ur 'magnetic black hole' here ;)

*MMMMMMMUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAHHHHSSSSS*

hv a lovely new year my dear!

Wong Ah Beng said...

kookaburas..
hahaha..bangla cheap labor maa..murah sahaja penjimatan cost!!
Kehilupan Kucing Terlampau lu sulah tengok kaa? :D

anony..
Wa just being myself. wa talak suluh sapa2 cakap ahbeng selupa wa pun.. Jikalau meleka cakap selupa ahbeng itu adalah kelana meleka pun mau bercita2 menjadi seolang ahbeng yang berjaya. Tambahan pula kita lakyat m'sia masyialakat majmuk hilup aman daman lukun tetangga okkkk :)

leez1312..
lahling aaa.. Mana pigi outstation tinggal wa solang2 sini... Manyiak lindu sama lu juaa..Ohhh noo.. wa bukan gayyy maaah..jangan worry..
Happy Nude Year to you tuuu..
Pegi konsert PiterPan takk? ;P

brainlessmonkey said...

I know la you perasan cute. But pleaselah don't make me visualise a monkey and a hansap cat together-gether. So the keji. Yukk!!

pinky angel said...

lu nmpk kulus dan lebey kiut.
*jgn lupa pulangkan kamela wa yg buat effek khas tu tau.. hehe..

okay, it's ur turn. No, no!! don't bite.. =p

toughcookie said...

waah... ini hali wa mahu join sama tikus2 lain lu yang keji...

ini kelana lu punya entry wa manyaak setuju woh... espeseli #4 & #5. lain2 wa talak setuju sangat leh. sikalang, wa sulah jumpa and made flens sama itu orang2 yang juga flust woh... tapi lu manyiak talak baik la talak kesian sama mereka yang hati sulah picah...

aiyoh... ini tawun suda akan habis mau masuk new year... so, halap semua celita akan lebeh baik leh...

Wong Ah Beng said...

brainlessmonkey..
ya lor..a cat spanking a monkey..Such unsightly sight.. Say, why not we stop all these role-playing game and ..well..u know...spank!spank!
:o

kinky angel..
Lu punya henpon wa sudah baling anjing..har har..Err..ok..I'll stop biting. Would nibbling suffice? :D

tuffkooki..
Ugh..There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off your pictures. :>

fara said...

Rejected by a reject - that happens if I dumped someone. Worse, isnt it?

this new yer, lu jgn manyak sedih pikir psal semua ur gfs yg lari tuh, ok?

Anonymous said...

heh macam tu la pulak

toughcookie said...

hehe... babeh, u said it so yourself in tips #5 -'tampal gambar lu yang paling gorjes...'. but then again, all cats are colour blind ;P

brainlessmonkey said...

*sepak ahbeng*

*sepak lagi*

*sepak lagi sekali*

Not sore enough? *sepak*

Was it good for you?

Wong Ah Beng said...

fara..
Dun worry..with you beside me under the mistletoe this new year, I wouldnt be thinking of them runaway gfs at all.. :@

anon..
aiyahh..sungguh lamai olang anonymous lu mana satu punya anonymous? next time kasik sign bawah lu punya name senang wa mau lujuk balik maaa :)


tuffcookie..
Au contraire, cats are not color blind. We just do not see color as well as u do, especially shades of red. Your nipple for an example. Is it brownish red, or pink? I wouldnt know...
Oh, and your gorjes pics.. Gurl, all those curves, and me with no brakes.. ho ho ho.
;>

brainlessmoney..
dear, r u have suffering from psychosexual disorder? there's a term for your type of paraphilia; sadism :o

nurul bahiyah said...

telimakasih le klezy ket, nasihat engko ni betul2 mujalab la.

Wong Ah Beng said...

no-rules bahiyah..
wa sama-sama. semuga nasihat wa mendapat pengajalan dalipada luu.. :)

Anonymous said...

epi new year ahbeng,
lu ade tak petue mcm mane nk
hlgkn stress kene mrah dgn boss..
gua blom penah bercinte r..
tp gua tau (bkn rase..) mcm mn feeling kene dumped,
kalo kene mrh dgn bos wa byk kali kene..sdh lali...
hehe...
rite now im feeling like..
i want to kill my boss..
kill2,die2..

nama wa. hanamici.
ahbeng lu nk mrh wa sbb post bnde out of topic pn wa talak kesah lg...=))

jasmine79 said...

Bengbeng: i know you have been dumped by someone. I know you have suffered from a tremendous pain, disheartened by someone who doesn't appreciate the love you have nourished for her. You have me for a shoulder to cry on..let me stroke your long hair and pat you..come..lai lai..

Don't worry my cutie cat, an old adage said: bunga bukan sekuntum kumbang bukan seekor. Beng beng i can recommend you other female species if you insisted..just name it, persian, short hair, long hair, chinchilla, tabby, sphinx, burmese, siamese..or if you want me to be your owner oso can..what u need to do is just "whisper"..;)

Wong Ah Beng said...

anony: hanamichi..
Adakah lu nama penuh ialah hanamichi sakuragi? pemain bola keranjang slamdunk tersebut? :o

jasmine69..
wahwahwah lama hilang talak nampak sekalang lu muncul terus bikin sajak eh..powah..powah..lu punya komen sungguh memilukan hati...uhuh.. I'll whisper ur name if u scream mine ok :)

Anonymous said...

aiya ahbeng at last ada org kenal sama wa..
wa manyak hepi..=)
lu mau autoglaf wa ka?
bole...bole...
=)

Wong Ah Beng said...

anonymous..
Otoglaf? tamau laa...wa minat Kaede Rukawa :p

kepala_angin said...

beng, u selalu ke dump orang huh?

jasmine79 said...

BEEEENnnnnnnnGGGGGGGGGG...BBBBBEEEEEENNNnnnnngGGGGGgggggGGGGGGGGGGGggggAAAAaaaaaaHHHhhhhhBEEEEEEnnnnnNNNgggGGGGGGggggGGG...wa sulah scleaaaamm namaaa lu..lu talak dengar, itu tandaaaa sulaah 20 hali lu talak kolek telingee..

so pussy cat..what can you offer? ;)

jasmine79 said...

bengbeng: lu pon pandai bikin sajak jugak..sikalang manyaaak jiwang aar..apa maciaaam..sulah talak bloken heart meh?? or lu sulah tukar profesen..mau jadik itu dr luv, luv, luv..

Wong Ah Beng said...

KA..
uhh..hello :)

jasmine69..
Depends on how much u can take lorr.. ;)

jasmine69 again..
If i'm doc luv, will u be my patient? I plomise I'll ..treat.. u well :o

jasmine79 said...

beng beng..just name it, i surely can take it!!!!..(icon semangatt berkobar-kobar)

i dont want to be your patient..i want to be your nurse..auuwww..can be your assistant maa..hali hali muleh tengok muke lu yg teramat gorges di rantaaau asiaa pacifik.

jasmine79 said...

beng beng kenape ada icon lupe itu maciaaaam..:O <-- i tot you would be delightful instead maciamm terkenaaa elektrikkk shock..:P

Wong Ah Beng said...

jasmine69..
That will be booooring...if u my nurse then i kenot do a ..medical.. checkup on yuuuuu ;)

jasmine69 again..
:o <-- ini adalah icon muka teruja maaah..

jasmine79 said...

keji...lu mau wa sakit selalu meh?? ... hali hali mauu peliksaa...haiyaaa.. anyway free of charge ke? :P hehe...

(^-^) <=== my cutest darlingest look..

Wong Ah Beng said...

jasmine69..
fuc..i mean.. FOC...yup :)

jasmine79 said...

:O <== muke tercekik bijik dulian...fuc?

Wong Ah Beng said...

jasmine69..
gelojoh nyerrrr... sampai tecekik bijik dulian.. Olang kata polumpuan elojoh adalah kuat nafsu...hu hu hu ;P

jasmine79 said...

nafsu makan kuat laaa..yang lain2 gua talak tauu..blom teraii maaa..

Wong Ah Beng said...

justmine69..
Jangan ikut nafsu makan nanti gumok macam wa maa.. :()

jasmine79 said...

gumuk talak penyakit okay maa..kalu gumuk maciam2 sakit wa pon manyak takut..tp aar..sesetengah olang gumuk ada cuteee jugak..lase mau picit2 ..manyiakk geraam!! soo noti cat..do u want to join da club?? kasik ramas2 n picit2.. (6_6)

Wong Ah Beng said...

justmine69..
Wa tak gumok laa...wa cuma seyhat sahaja.. :p

jasmine79 said...

haha..denial!!..:P

asamkeping said...

hi beng. i just broke up recently and it was very painful but reading your advises ni buat i gelak pecah perut. :) thank u!

Nenek Sihir said...

wow!!mmg gud advice la!! hehehe xD
saya start blogging pown pas kene dump..x sgke dpt jumpe jgk blog ni.XD


Kiss my asss!!